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Students and Light Bulb

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Q: How many University of Michigan freshman does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None, it's a sophomore course.

 
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Wolverine Fan and Pig

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Q: What do you get when you cross a University of Michigan fan and a pig?

A: Nothing. There's some things that a pig will not do.

 
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Genie Help

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General Schwarzkopf was walking through the desert during the Gulf War when he found a lamp on the ground. He picked it up, rubbed, and out came a genie.

The genie said to the General, "I will grant you one wish." The General replied, "I wish that we will win this war. Here is a map of the desert and all the war parties. Please make us win the war."

The genie responded, "I'm not that powerful of a genie. I cannot grant you that wish."

"Well," the General responds, "then can you have University of Michigan win a bowl game this year?"

After a moment, the genie says, "Let me see that map again."

 
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Groundhog's Day

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Q: What do you get when you cross a groundhog and a Wolverine?

A: Six more weeks of bad football.

 
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The Michigan Opossums

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Q: Why should the University of Michigan change its name to the "Opossums"?

A: Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

 
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