You Know you're at a Ghetto Funeral

If 3 generations get out of a car to beat down someone for cutting into the funeral procession.

If you got relatives coming in shackled from the state pen to pay their respects.

A fist fight breaks out.

When people are breaking down crying and trying to climb into the casket.

When the dead person is wearing $3,000 worth of jewelry.

When friends and family wear T-shirts with a photo of the deceased on it..to

the funeral!

When someone walks around to view the body and yells out "DAT WUZ MY NI**A!"

When the brothas are standing' around drinking' after the service and someone pours a lil' supmtin' out on the ground for the homey who's no longer with us."

When one of the relatives keeps fainting before, during and after the service.

When everybody is trying to get the flowers and take them home.

When the dinner after the funeral turns into a family reunion, all the old folk break out the cards to play spades/tonk, somebody start playing some Marvin Gaye, and all the older men start talking about how they used to pimp back in the day.

When the obituary was made on a home typewriter and it's filled with misspelled words...even the name of the deceased!

When the picture on the obituary is the deceased license photo!

When everybody trying to out cry one another as if whoever cries the loudest is going to get a prize after the funeral...

If the deceased didn't have 2 nickels to rub together but leaves the world in a $15,000 silk lined coffin.

When the soloist sings about 15 verses of "Precious Lord" or "His eye is on the sparrow" and "I won't complain."

When the funeral is two weeks after the death.