Top 10 Proposed Closing Arguments in the Matter of United State

From the law offices of Johnnie Cochran, Esq., here are the top 10 proposed closing arguments in the matter of United States vs. William Jefferson Clinton:

10. If the dress ain't a mess, he won't need to confess

9. The economy's great, let the White Boy skate

8. If the Bitch didn't spit, you must acquit

7. If she is not spread eagle, then it is not illegal

6. Lewinsky's a whore, and Bill's better than Gore

5. So he lied to the masses, he was just saving some asses

4. He cheats on his wife, but its his personal life

3. Bill can't tell the truth till he sees Ken Starr's proof

2. Bill is not sleazy, Lewinsky's just easy

1. If the s** is just oral, it is not really immoral